You’re drinking. And you’re not thinking about tomorrow. You’re thinking about today. You’re thinking about now. And only now. After all… now is now. Tomorrow may come. But, when you’re drinking, tomorrow may as well be a lifetime away.
But my friends… tomorrow does come. Today was tomorrow. And it hurt. I’m a trooper, so I didn’t let it break me – but it did hurt. And I made new vows. Vows that I may or may not adhere to. But for now, today, I am sticking to them steadfastly! I don’t like the hurt! I’m not a fan of physical pain. Emotional pain has its uses in terms of songwriting – but that is a whole essay for a rainy day – but physical pain is only for the deviants of this world. Of which I am not one. I am me. Ha ha!
Lucozade is a drink that I can definitely recommend. I know I could get the same result mixing 100 spoons of sugar into some water – but Lucozade comes in a yellow bottle, and has a Z in the title! I know, I know… you’re going to tell me to “get with the rest of the modern world” and drink Red Bull. Or some other drink that has packaging that looks like a tattoo. Well, I’m not drinking something that looks like a ’70s aftershave, and I’m not drinking something that has ‘Bull’ as part of the name and medicine as part of the taste. So… old skool Lucozade it is. Oh, and I found that a Double Decker as the food part of the ‘food and drink’ equation works wonders too! I would ordinarily dunk the Double Decker in hot coffee… but I don’t suggest boiling the Lucozade to try to achieve the same result. I tell you my friends… it would be a regrettable situation involving much sweetness, tears and mess.
So, that was a day of my life written off. No songs to be written when I can’t be sure I’m even making a coherent sentence. I wonder if I could use Lucozade to my advantage on a day not having involved drink the night before – perhaps to help the songwriting process? Hmmm. Every positive has a corresponding negative. And Lucozade‘s negative is HUGE! This drink is… radioactive! Or at least it is when it comes into contact with a carpet. I once made the mistake of drunkenly spilling Lucozade on the carpet in my house. Okay, I compounded this error by then forgetting I’d done it and going to bed. Cue next day… glance at the floor… Arrrgh! What the hell? Here’s my question then – Why does Lucozade stain your carpet pink??? I mean… that is surely a very peculiar colour for a yellow drink. To stain a carpet pink? Hmmm. Now here’s a thought. Is the actual drink yellow? Or is it just the bottle? I haven’t got any Lucozade here right now to check this out. Maybe it’s clear? Or… maybe it’s pink, and they put it in a yellow bottle to hide the fact it’s pink – so blokes will buy it. (They don’t sell no pink Yorkies – no no no). But… then… the pink would clash with the yellow to produce a weird looking bottle. So maybe the bottle isn’t actually yellow – it’s some other colour that when mixed with pink looks yellow. Anyway… today I drank some Lucozade and it made me feel better. Then I drank 4 cans of Coke before I typed this. Can you tell?
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