It has been an epic encounter. Me vs This Album. But, I think all’s well that ends well. I have recorded the final track for my album All Monsters and Dust. The track is titled Perhaps I’ll Kill You. It’s not quite as nasty a title as you may at first think. Hmmmmm… How best to describe? I’ll tell the story…
A long time ago I started writing songs. Once I hit my stride I never really looked back. There was a period during the 2000s when I drifted away from music… but it has always been there or thereabouts in my life. Anyway… when I was about 16 I wrote a song called Perhaps I’ll Kill You. It was about the third ‘proper’ song I ever wrote. It was primarily a punk song… but it started with a great guitar riff. Now… this new song you are about to listen to has very little to do with that third song I wrote. But that song was certainly the inspiration. I took the guitar riff and played it on bells instead. When you press play it’s pretty much the first thing you now hear. None of the rest of the music or lyrics have anything to do with that original song… Just the riff on the chimes. But what a riff that is! So… you can see that already the song has a certain sentimental value.
The knowledge that this was to be the final song for my debut album as Confession of the Whole School meant the recording of the song was shrouded in excitement and unresolved angst! I had a choice of directions to take. Pop song, rock song etc etc. Poetic lyrics etc etc. Well… I abandoned those avenues and made a fresh decision. Well, a couple of fresh decisions really.
1) Let’s take what has so recently interested me about music – my trip to see Les Miserables. Let’s see if I can make a rock song that has the essence of musical theatre. Let’s see if I can crush a whole stage show into the length of a single. Let’s see if I can jettison the trappings of indie rock ‘formula’. Let’s see if I can produce a song that sounds new. A new genre. High and mightily egotistical that thinking may be. But can I do it?
2) Let’s dispel the idea that indie rock should have ‘poetic’ lyrics. Flowered up, art farty words that fit the song but are really like that mint you get at the end of a meal. Yes… it’s there and everything… yes I suppose it’s quite nice… but I don’t really give a shit about it. That feeling that everything is all surface. Let’s write a set of lyrics that simply say what I want to say. Closer to rap maybe. Yes… that’s a better explanation. Perhaps closer to the kind of thing Mike Skinner did as The Streets back when he was good.
So… bang those two points together and you get this final song. Perhaps I’ll Kill You. A speech set to music. An agenda. A song that finally rules a line under everything that has gone before and completes All Monsters and Dust – an album that has bled me dry. Bled me dry. A song that while ending the past also sets up the future. A new direction for my music? Maybe.
This song is called PERHAPS I’LL KILL YOU. It may be a bit heavyweight. It may not be the norm. It may not be ‘good’. But it is me. Now and for the future. Listen with open ears. Live and let live! Press play.