Album Review: PULP – ‘HIS ‘N’ HERS’

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I’ll be honest right from the start.  I’ve drunk a fair bit of wine.  So much so that my fingers look like lightning across the keyboard.  A FrEnZy I tell thee!!!!  Ha ha!!!!

London is burning.  The rioting is spreading.  Don’t get me started on my feelings about the cretins involved in this mindless nonsense!  All I hear on the news channels is people sticking up for the behaviour of these idiots of society.  Well… as people in my own city plan their own riots (for possessions you understand… looting for POSSESSIONS… there is no political ideology on display here!!! 😐 ) I shall sink into the deepest recesses of music.  You will all know me by now.  You will know I can ramble.  Well… I have precisely one hour to put some thoughts onto the interweb.  This will be stream of consciousness stuff so expect wrongness.  And inconsequence!

What comes to mind then…. I mean to write about.  Hmmm.  More wine first vicar!

How about a ‘discussion’ of an album.  Hmmmm.  What album though.  I get the feeling that in my time with you – and I hope it will be years – I will discuss a huge variety of albums!  Rubber Soul seems the next  ‘apt’ album to discuss in terms of my recent road trip.  Or perhaps a punk album, maybe the Sex Pistols in light of the riots.  Or the Kaiser Chiefs… clever blokes 😉

No… I shall write about an album that is important to me.  An album that changed my life – for a while.  Perhaps for ever really. His ‘n’ Hers by Pulp.

Back-story.  I was well into rock music in my youth.  You could even go so far as to call me a ‘metaller’.  Ha ha!  Seriously… I was well into my Sabbath, Maiden, Aerosmith etc etc ad infinitum.  That wasn’t a problem.  I enjoyed it.  It was important to me.  Then along came grunge.  And grunge changed everything.  So much so that I’m sure I’ll write some entries about certain grunge albums in the future!  I started a band.   I drafted in someone I met at school.  He approached me one day with an armful of grunge albums and lent them to me no questions asked.  He’d just moved into the area and I’m sure it was a way to make a friend (the guy with long hair and a leather jacket was probably the safest bet for him!!!).  Ha ha!  Anyway… I did indeed borrow those albums… and I loved them.  I think it was stuff like Nevermind and Ten, pretty mainstream really…. but do you remember those times – were you even born then?!?  It was refreshing.  It changed the landscape of music.  Me and ‘the guy who lent me those albums’ became great friends.  Hmmm… perhaps warrants a new paragraph?

So we started a band.  I claimed I could play the guitar.  Well, compared to him and his mates I was like a flippin’ guitar hero.  Ha ha!  What we needed was a bass player… so he bought a cheap bass.  I taught him to play it and a band was in the making.  He went on to become a really great bass player, perhaps I’ll get a cheque in the post one day!  Ha ha!  No, seriously, that guy had talent and we actually made a great partnership.   I went to Uni and converted a couple more people to my cause.  A keyboard player (who I at least converted, if not actually taught, to play the guitar) and a drummer.  We were a punk band I suppose.  Punk in as much as we couldn’t play… but also punk in as much as I was well into the Pistols and the Buzzcocks at the time.  And elements of Nirvana’s first album, Bleach, came into play.  Nirvana… remember Nirvana?   The frightening thing is that some people genuinely think that Dave Grohl is just the front-man of the Foo Fighters.  They don’t even know he was the drummer of a really important rock band?!?  But that’s just the way of the world.  Isn’t it?  Memories fade.  And sometimes memories are poured onto a computer screen when one is drinking wine!!!

So I was a rocker in a punk band.  I was rocker in a punk band with all the trappings.  Easy.  Very easy.  Then Brit-Pop happened.  I was slowly converted to the likes of Blur and pretty much instantly to the likes of Oasis.  It’s difficult in hindsight to remember how totally game-changing “Definitely Maybe” was at the time.  It not only created a band wagon but it created the biggest band and the very biggest wagon!!!  Seriously… you should have seen the size of the wheels!?!  You needed to clamber up a 6 foot supermodel’s shoulders just to reach the cab!  Ha ha!  So my band at the time graduated to the title of “indie pop band” – as did every other band of the day!  All bands became Oasis!  We started to hang out in indie clubs.  Perhaps I’ll tell stories of those times one day.  But we enjoyed our particular brand of insulated imaginary fame!  Ha ha! Then I heard a song.  I cannot remember where it figured exactly in the time line.  But it was probably on Top of the Pops, or in the indie clubs.  I heard the song “Babies” by Pulp.  Babies.

That kind of changed everything.  That one song.  I was converted instantly.  This band was a revelation.  Even just to look at – they were extreme.  A weird mix of modern and complete nostalgia.  David Bowie, disco and Brit-Pop.  A gangly front-man….. a girl playing the keyboards – and an angelic sound.  As with the other bands of the time it’s hard to listen to the music now and recognise the dynamite, neon-flamed abuse of the senses that erupted at the time.  They were extraordinary.  Completely.  So much so that I can still taste the first few times I heard that song on my tongue.  I still remember the first time!  😉  And I have an infamously bad memory!!!  The song “Babies” is a track from an album called His ‘n’ Hers by a band called Pulp.  Now… if I was going to be ‘cool’ I’d actually big up their previous album, “Separations”  – another magnificent album.  But, I have to be honest with you my faithful readers, this is a confessional site and His ‘n’ Hers was in many ways my confessional album.

The album was actually a huge way into Pulp’s career… and yet it feels like a debut album.  Actually strike that… it feels like a reboot.  In the same way that Nolan rebooted Batman and all the superheroes are currently receiving reinventions, Pulp recognised what worked and what didn’t from their past – and started again from square one.  The violins and the electronics are still there. The moody reflection and autumnal tones are still very much in play.  But Pulp finally found that magical ingredient so often missing before – a good song.

The album kicks in with ‘Joyriders’.  A track which to this day I still remember all the words to.  I just love the way the song smacks you in the face immediately.  There’s no intro.  This song signifies an album with straight-ahead intentions.

“We can’t help it we’re so thick we can’t think.

Can’t think of anything but shit, sleep and drink”

A song that seems SO relevant in the current climate of disillusionment and destruction.  People making excuses for their actions.  It’s like Jarvis is a prophet – like he should be bowed down to.  Jarvis.  Jarvis Cocker!  I DO bow down to Jarvis Cocker.  Never has someone made so much from so little.  And yet… that is unfair.  He has that certain ‘something’.  You can’t quite put your finger on it… but he has IT.  I wished I was him at the time.  Maybe I still do now!  Ha ha!

This majestic album then hits you with “Lipgloss”.  It’s at this point that you realise the lyrics are genius.  They are like a diary.  Fair enough, a diary from someone who is having a more interesting life than you.  But in any case, I certainly remember listening to the lyrics and experiencing a revelatory moment.  Songs could be SO from the heart that they BECAME the heart.  Heart and soul. Heart and soul.  ///throws up!

Acrylic Afternoons is perhaps the true highlight of the album.  This song needs to be experienced – preferably lying on your bed in a darkened room (only really an activity you can perform as a student).  I had similar experiences in that ‘darkened room’ with Portishead and Jeff Buckley, but  I’m sure I’ll talk about them another day.  Acrylic Afternoons is almost perfect.  It’s fragile… gentle.  A world away from Iron Maiden or the Ramones.  And yet in some ways infinitely more powerful.  That’s what pains me about music reviews.  It’s so easy to spout verbal shite about music.  To be all verbally dexterous with your verbiage. But the honest reality is that you just have to hear it for yourself.  You may not like it… but you have to hear it.

This diary of an album continues until we come to the song “Babies”.  A song so good I will name it twice.  Babies Babies.  I won’t say too much about this song.  I CAN’T say too much about this song.  It’s just too important.  This single, solitary song underpins everything I have ever done.  It defines Confession of the Whole School to a certain extent.  It changed my life.  Set me on a different path – it HAS to be that important.  I (wrongly) relegated all of my heavy metal albums to the bottom drawer of my wardrobe for years.  Yes… years!  Seriously, Babies had that much of an impact.  It changed me!  It still changes me.  It remains one of the greatest songs ever written.  Check out the video!  It is tongue in cheek and unpretentious (considering the vastness of the song), but it is funny and witty and defines the band.  It also features the never to be topped dancing skills of Mr Cocker!  Common People may represent the band for the masses…. but for the believers, “Babies” is the song to beat!  🙂


So… I’m running out of time. Have I even started the album review yet?  “Babies” reminds me of so much. People I no longer see and things I no longer do.  It is MY song.  And for that reason I will never allow a bad word to be said about it!

The next song on the album is called “She’s a Lady”.  This song betrays the roots of Pulp.  For you see Pulp had to deal with being a ‘band’ when being a ‘band’ wasn’t cool.  They had to exist through acid house, rave, dance and all things electronic.  They adapted.  This is more evident on Separations… but it is indeed evident here on His ‘n’ Hers too.  She’s a Lady isn’t one of my favourites, but it has its moments.  Every song on this album does.  Because this is a classic album.  This album is up there with Definitely Maybe, Parklife and Dog Man Star.  For me it is the crowning glory of Brit-Pop whilst perhaps not being Brit-Pop at all.  It is a contrary album.  So, let’s just forget She’s a Lady shall we?

Happy Endings is another torn page from the Cocker diary.  An epic of Human League like proportions.  Jarvis is just perfect.  The perfect singer who can’t sing.  As are Jonny Rotten and Alice Cooper.  You don’t have to be able to sing conventionally to win my heart. In fact I insist!  If you win the X-Factor I will disown you!  I promise.

“Happy Endings” is the companion piece to Blur’s “To the End”.  It is a magnificent song with the cutest keyboard solo ever!  Ha ha!

Then comes perhaps the stand-out single from the album.  Another song that instantly reduces me to tears.  Because it really is THAT GOOD!

Do You Remember the First Time?

“I can’t remember a worse time.”

The perfect “indie”TM single.  This song, along with Suede’s whole first album, cornered the market in swirling sexual indie rock.  There was no point anyone else even trying afterwards.  “Do You Remember the First Time” could be summed up as a Buzzcocks single for the ’90s. A song the Buzzcocks, in their prime, might have written.   Sheer diary.  Sheer poetry.  Sheer class.  Sheer riff-age.  Sheer perfection.

Pink Glove continues the veiled lyrics.  The secret written word that you can’t believe someone is actually singing. So close to the bone.  Like a bloody post-mortem!  Excuse me while I nip downstairs for more wine. —- Back.  Yep… The lyrics to Pink Glove almost make me cry.  You know something’s good when you can say that.

So… all that really leaves me to talk about is the final track on the album – “David’s Last Summer”.  An epic.  A 7 minute epic.  Having now written a few epics myself I can appreciate the influence this song may have had on me.  I’ll never be a ‘speaker’ of words, I’ll always be a singer – so I couldn’t say the song is ‘vocally’ an influence. But it is certainly an inspiration.  Not one I ever think about.  But it must have had an impact on my younger self. As did a song like Rime of the Ancient Mariner.  The idea of a song as a series of movements.  The idea of words as a series of moments.  They can tie together or they can drift apart.  There are no rules.  Listen to David’s Last Summer.  There are no rules.  And yet the song totally sticks to the rules.  Its own rules… but rules nevertheless.  And so… my self-imposed time limit comes to an end.  Sorry if this ‘so-called review’ has been a little obtuse.  I should be better prepared for these things.  The old rock CDs were eventually allowed out of that drawer, and everything returned to normality.  With age comes the realisation that you don’t have to be embarrassed by the music that you love.  In fact you should do everything in your power to promote it.  Pulp can easily live alongside Wolfsbane, for example.  For although they sound completely different, there is a drive and determination fuelling all of the best bands.  Whether they do it with a bark or a gentle yap is kind of irrelevant.

Hmmmm…. a score?  You want a score?  That is very difficult.  I’m tempted to give this album a 10/10.  However there are moments of distinct 5/10… yet they are so very few and far between.  Floating, bobbing carrier bags in a glittering ocean. Hmmmm.  For me this album is close to perfection.  It is certainly dating. I don’t deny that.  And yet it was dated when it was released. Even then it harked back to the glam of  ’70s Britain.  Platform boots and singers driving into trees.  Hmmm.

PULP – HIS ‘N’ HERS: 9/10

The Liver Birds

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Okay… I warn you in advance.  This is gonna be one looonggg post!  I have a lot to say – or rather a lot to show.  Look… think of this as a book.  A post that you can dip in and out of.  Like that bird thing that drank the water that Homer used to keep the Nuclear Power Plant running.  Just a tappin’ that key.  Ha ha!

I went to Liverpool.  I saw a lot of things, and I took a lot of pictures.  Some of these pictures will end up as band artwork so I may hold them back.  But I will try to reveal as much of interest as I can.

First things first.  I took the ferry across the Mersey.  Sing the song in your head whilst viewing the photos.  This ferry crossing gave me the first chance to see the Liver Building.  The Liver Building will be talked about in detail a little later.  It also enabled me to see the Port of Liverpool building from the water.  The Liverpool river front is certainly a captivating sight!

(note the huge cathedral in the 5th image… we’ll see more of that later!)

I visited Liverpool on the Centenary of the construction of its most famous building – the Liver Building.  This is one fantastic piece of architecture.  And to celebrate 100 years of its existence it was lit with a dazzling display of head spinning lights.  And I had the best view possible.  ‘Cause I was on the roof of the building opposite (a great Pan-Asian restaurant).  That restaurant was THE place to be in Liverpool that night.  The bouncers on the doors were working their asses off!

The Liver Building is the most amazing sight even without the light show.  Like the top of a sky scraper cut off.  Like you’ve cut the top off a boiled egg with a spoon.  And the building has two birds sitting on top of it.  The Liver birds.  There are many stories regarding how the birds came to be there and what they signify to the city – but safe to say, Liverpool would be in crisis if the birds were to fly away.

I just love this shot.  Reminds me of Ghostbusters!

This celebration also marked the opening of a new Museum dedicated to celebrating all things Liverpool.  I gotta say… I was not impressed with the museum.  I think they are gonna have to find a few things to actually put inside it.  At the moment it is just one HUGE empty staircase!!!

I filmed a short video to give an example of the light show.  It’s not exactly representative of actually being there.  But it gives you a flavour.  I particular liked the syncing of the sound to the light during the sequence played out on the museum building.  I know this kind of technology has been used before on famous buildings around the world.  But this was the first time I’ve seen such a thing… and it blew me away:

Anyway, like I said… superb light show.  And marking 100 years of an important British landmark.  And I was there!  Yippeee!!!!

I also entered the Port of Liverpool building.  Some great examples of extravagant architecture in this building.  Flourishes from a time when Britain ruled the world!

First thing the next morning I made my way to one of the most important buildings I have ever stepped into.  John Lennon’s childhood home:

This is the house John Lennon lived in with his Auntie Mimi throughout his childhood.  It is the house he lived in when he met Paul McCartney.  It is the house he lived in when the Beatles were formed.  It is the house that the young Lennon would sit in at night and listen to the radio – probably the Goons.  If you are a Beatles fan then it’s a pretty important place to be. I say “place to be”, because there really is a feeling of ‘occupying the same space’ if you catch my drift.

The house is ‘by appointment only’ so the general tourists can only stand outside the gate.  At one point this was strange ’cause you have to understand that the house is just an ordinary looking house in an ordinary looking street.  So at one point I’m standing in the porch.  Now this is interesting to me as this was the porch that John and Paul used to hang out in with their guitars (Aunt Mimi wouldn’t let Paul in any further!).  So I’m standing there… basking in the ambience… when I look out the window to see 100 Japanese tourists taking pictures, of the house, of the porch, with my face looking out.  Hmmm… way to be famous!  Ha ha!

Seriously though… fantastic ambience.  You get a free reign of the house (after having your camera locked away!).  I stood in the small room where John would listen to the radio.  I stood in his bedroom.  I kind of felt the presence of a young John being rebellious in the house to the lodgers that Aunt Mimi would invariably accommodate.  For a fan like me… fantastic!

Although the house is ‘just’ a house… it has a certain aura.  It even featured on the cover of a single by Oasis – Live Forever (although they had the sense not to wear a Pac-Man T-shirt!)

So….hmmm… where to go after John Lennon’s childhood home?  Hmmmm… How about Paul McCartney’s?

20 Forthlin Road is similar to Lennon’s house in that you have to book to get in.  It’s a terraced house in a typical street.  A little poorer that Lennon’s area.  Again, I have no photos from inside the house as they lock away all cameras.  The purpose of this is that there are unpublished photos and artefacts inside.  Although the ambience was slightly different to Lennon’s house, in many ways this is actually the more important of the two houses.  This is the house that a lot of the early Beatles songs were written.  I have photos of John and Paul writing songs in this house.  I have grown up with those photos – and finally I was able to stand in that living room and place one foot where I know Paul sat, and one where I knew John sat.  For a moment there I was literally standing in history.  For a Beatles fan like myself this is/was a huge deal.  Standing in Paul McCartney’s bedroom.  Seeing the drain pipe he climbed up to get into his room when the house was locked at night.  Most importantly though… to stand on the original tiles of the kitchen floor.  These tiles had been stood upon by all four Beatles.  Sent a shiver up my spine!!!

McCartney’s mother died a year after he moved into this house so it obviously holds mixed emotions for Paul.  He has never been back since he left.  But nevertheless… it makes an interesting pilgrimage for a Beatles fan!

Okay… here’s something I wasn’t going to do… but anyway.  Here’s a song I wrote inspired by the visits to those houses.  It is called “Last Night But Three“.  It will be the centrepiece of my next Confession of the Whole School album and this is a sneaky surprise just for my devoted fans (It won’t be available to anyone else until the release of the next album).  Why not press play and then read the rest of the article?

So… Childhood homes… Childhood homes.  Where to go next?  Hmmmm… How about Penny Lane?

Penny Lane is a street that forms a junction not far from Lennon’s house.  At the time of the boys’ youth this would have been a very busy junction as it was next to a bus station.  The area is quite upmarket now and a barber shop is still there.  Other than that, this place probably holds more interest for me than anyone else. For your average person it’s probably just another street.

I hold McCartney and his Beatles-era songs (such as Penny Lane) in high regard.  He is a much maligned Beatle with most people forgetting that it was actually McCartney who was the experimenter.  It was McCartney who wove the tape loops and inspired the most psychedelic songs such as Tomorrow Never Knows.  It is McCartney who did not get murdered and therefore did not become a deity.  And it is McCartney who is our greatest living songwriter.

Anyway…

To take a break from the Beatles for a second I would like to show you a few photos I took at that huge Cathedral that we could see from the Mersey Ferry.

A breathtakingly big cathedral… I think my photos do it justice!

And the views from the top of this monumental building were incredible!!!

And a bomber just happened to fly past!

And … relax… Ha ha!  So… off to the Cavern!  Yay!

So… The Cavern Club… Possibly the most famous club in the world?  Everyone knows the story of how this iconic building was demolished right?  It was an underground club and was filled in as part of some kind of railway work.  A National Disaster if you ask me!!!  Anyway… the Cavern was rebuilt with many of the original bricks and to roughly the original layout in approximately the same place.  So you can now go to the Cavern as a Beatles fan and pretend to let its atmosphere wash over you.  I was genuinely surprised at how much of a “gigging venue” this place actually is.  I want to play there.  Ha ha!  You get that feeling of cramped conditions and sweat dripping off the ceiling.  You can almost imaging the Beatles playing there.  When I walked in I was amazed at how deep down into the ground you feel you’re going.  Some guy was on stage playing Beatles songs to anyone who shouted a song title out.  I was actually pretty impressed with him. Good luck… whoever you are. Here’s a (very) short video:

The original entrance to the Cavern still exists:

As I said at the beginning… I shall hold a bit back for future artwork… but I hope you got a taste of Liverpool.  From my experience, a city that is still very proud of the Beatles.  In fact, if they’re going to have a museum dedicated to the city then they’d better find something other than the Beatles to put in it.  The city seems to exist in the shadow of the Beatles… and what a fantastic shadow that is!  🙂  Thanks to Ioanna and Pete for their amazing knowledge of the city!

Thoughts of the Day on Comedy

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Okay, here’s a review I felt I just had to write.  It’s a review for a BBC series called “The Trip”.  It was shown on TV last year, and although I watched it and loved it then… since buying it on DVD it is now fresh on the mind.  I’ve kind of given away the final score by using the word “love” in the third sentence… but that’s not important.  This review is not intended to be a suspenseful review.  It is intended to be a review that mines the soul.  For if you have read anything of my site, anything of my love of music you will know that I already believe that music and comedy are intrinsically linked.  Timing.  Rhythm.  Sheer brutal cleverness!

I have yet to write my full post for my all time comedy hero. The day I get around to writing my ‘essay’ on Tony Hancock will be a long day for you all – for I will wax lyrical.  Until then please accept this snippet of thought on comedy.  My thoughts of the day on comedy!

I found the Trip to be bloody marvellous for a number of reasons – which I could easily bullet point, but I choose to ramble.  I choose to ramble!

This is a comedy series that dwells on one of my favourite elements of comedy.  The repeating of a joke. The repeating of a joke ad infinitum.  This is a technique which looses a lot of people, and many of the haters of this series just didn’t ‘get’ the repetition.  But ignore those haters for they are stupid people.  They do not see the glory of the technique.  The Trip is a hard program to talk about without being all ‘spoilery’… but I will do my best to discuss the show in a way that will not ruin anything.  I will not repeat my “Lost – Final Episode” review error!!!

I think it’s important to know a little of the characters before watching the series.  In fact I’m actually quite surprised that the show has gone down so well around the world as I really think a lot of the comedy is quite colloquial.  This is a show about two people.  Steve Coogan is for me, the comedy genius.  I use that word infrequently, but it certainly applies here.  When he is at the top of his game he is the best in the world.  The best.  But, like Hancock before him, he is a hit and miss kind of guy.  When he’s great he’s great… and when he’s bad he’s really bad!  But for me that is what genius is all about.  A razor’s edge.  A tightrope.  These people will fall.  And they will land hard.  John Cleese, Peter Cooke, Tony Hancock, the list of these geniuses is a long one.  Hit and miss.  The same with music.  Brian Wilson, Paul McCartney, Elvis, Jackson etc etc.  Artists who, when they were at their best, produced the best music ever made.  And when they were at their worst stunk the place out.

Steve Coogan plays an exaggerated version of his self.  At least we guess that it’s exaggerated.  In all actuality it’s very likely that he’s closer to ‘this’ Steve Coogan than he’d like to admit.  But, in any case, he plays an actor in a career lull.  An actor who knows that he has hit dizzying heights… but just can’t grasp them any more.  An actor who has tried his hand at “cracking America” and failed.  An actor who is trying to (wait for it) – find himself. I know… yuk!

Rob Brydon also plays his exaggerated self.  An actor who lives via his impersonations of others.  There is a Peter Sellers like quality to the man.  The idea that in some ways he doesn’t quite have a personality of his own.  Rob Brydon very much plays up to the “populist-fool” and a kind of tabloid paper against Coogan’s Broadsheet.  In actual fact Brydon has been in some pretty clever stuff himself and is a fine comic actor in his own right.

So, we have these two characters slammed together in a chosen/enforced trip around the restaurants of the north of England.  The set-up is that Coogan must write restaurant reviews for a newspaper.  But in reality this story is just an excuse to throw these two lost souls together.  And the sheer brilliance of this move is that Coogan and Brydon are both impressionists.  Not painters!  I mean they both have a history of doing ‘impressions’ of celebrities for radio/TV.  And so the series becomes something of a war between the two.  Battle after battle of impressions.  One trying to out do the other.  And so enters the repetition.  Honestly, when this was first aired I remember spending a whole week having a battle with a colleague over who could do the best Michael Caine.  This wouldn’t have been too much of a problem were it not for the fact that the line we were both constantly saying was “She was only 16 years old…”.  Hmmmm.  Could be misconstrued!

The repetition does not live within a single episode.  It stretches across the series.  The same lines are said again and again.  This is like music.  You have your drumbeat and your bass line.  I know I’m sounding pretentious.  But I really do believe that the best ‘comedy’ is similar to the best music.

So… moments of genius.  Honestly… the discussion of what constituted the perfect Michael Caine had me in stitches.  And this ‘formula’ is repeated throughout the series.  Battles of Connerys, Moores, Hopkins… the list goes on.  Proper dissections of acting technique – the whole Richard Gere section is amazing.

I just loved this series.  It was funny and moving.  The moments when, for all his achievements, Coogan just wishes he could have Brydon’s charm.  Coogan’s attempts to do Brydon’s “Man in a Box” in his mirror.  The emptiness that Coogan portrays even though he is a man with money, fast cars and as many women as he wants.  These are two actors at the top of their game.  Both the improvised and scripted sections melt together and you’re left with a comedy that equals the best of the Office or Curb Your Enthusiasm.  Only at a more relaxed pace.

I mentioned the sorrow.  And this is a really important strand of the show.  For all the ups there are all the downs.  The most poignant being the words Brydon shouts to Coogan when Coogan falls into the river when trying to navigate the stepping-stones.  There are just so many highlights: Coogan speaking at Brydon’s funeral.  The whole “Gentlemen.. to bed!” section. The discussion of what you are actually supposed to do when you sip the wine that the waiter pours for you.  I haven’t given anything away.  I’m just trying to persuade you to give this much maligned show a go.  It is the best British comedy of recent years.  I would hope that people who like my music would also like this show.

Anyway… just wait till I write about Hancock!!!  😉

Remember, Remember, The 11th Hour is a coming!!!

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This is just a reminder to check out the Eleventh Hour Initiative website

The Eleventh Hour Initiative website is the place to be for all things Eleventh Hour related!  The Eleventh Hour Initiative is my ongoing project with American Indie star Bill Ryan.  The debut album is almost complete and the countdown to the official release is close.  Very close!

The album, Escapism, is an important album for me for so many reasons.  Reasons I will no doubt expand upon one day.  But for now… I suggest you head on over to the site and sign up.  You will get a special password which will enable you to see goodies blocked from the general public’s view!!!

www.eleventhhourinitiative.com

Mastering

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1723 hours 17th  June 2011 – I sit here in my studio to take on the most difficult task of all.  To MASTER the Eleventh Hour Initiative’s debut album “Escapism”.  Mastering a piece of music basically means making sure it is ready for public consumption.  I am excited at the prospect… yet nervous too.  There are so many decisions to make.  Some are complicated, others are emotional.  I shall try and explain as I progress.  At the moment I am making some observations and notes in my little black book.  Perhaps I’ll share them later too!  I warn you that those of you who have no real interest in HOW music is created should look away now.  THIS POST WILL BORE YOU!  For those of you still here… read on.  There is very little written regarding mastering an album.  The recording and mixing always get the plaudits!

1808 – Frustrating already.  Bloody computers! Ha ha!  The modern studio!  I’m just working on Try and Get Some Sleep.  This is a fantastic little song and still well worthy of the “first track on the album” accolade!

Oh… here are those figures which I may discuss later.  These numbers are extremely important and actually tell a very interesting story!

Reading, Writing and Arithmetic – DR 12, RMS -15.7

Chinese Democracy – DR 10, RMS -12.7

Weekend in the City – DR 5, RMS -7.7

At War with the Mystics – DR 4, RMS -7.3

Death Magnetic – DR 3, RMS – 4.2

Them Crooked Vultures – DR 5, RMS -6.4

The Wild Hunt – DR 8, RMS -11.6

Along Came a Spider – DR 6, RMS -8.8

***  I collated these figures myself by running the CDs through my computer using a special audio capture program. ***

DR stands for Dynamic Range – the range of difference between quiet and loud.  A higher DR means more range of volume.  Get it? The RMS is basically the average volume.  The lower the RMS value the louder the song.  Generally speaking, the louder a song is…. the less dynamics it has.  At its most blatant this becomes a barrage of noise.  Quite befitting for some styles of music, but this is the standard that everyone is adapting to.  The accepted norm.  The accepted way to get your songs heard.  But the sheer volume can be tiring on the ears and can ruin certain forms of music.  Anyway…

1820 – I think I’m pretty happy with Try and Get Some Sleep.  The song has a bounce in its step.  I had a lucky strike on the first go and hit my target with my first shot!  Fingers crossed everything will be as easy.  I have certainly done enough work to this point to make this final step as easy as possible.

1833 – hmmm.  Here we go with Pitfall…  gulps. 1843 – still gulping ha ha! I’m just running off a mix now.  We’ll see if I hit the spot first time?!?!  1854 – Missed… but I think I nailed it second time.  So… onto Escape Plan.  This song has the potential to be a pretty big song for the band so I’ve got to get it right!

1907 – So, making a start on Escape Plan.

1933 – Not a lot of progress.  This song is a studio breaker!  A lot of different (temperamental) reverbs going on.  This song is a computer destroyer!  Ha ha!

2008 – I think I’ve got Escape Plan right.  I will obviously need to listen to the finished album through and make any final tweaks… but for now I think I’ve got it kicking.

2018 – Tinkering with the Calm and the Storm now.  This one is a bit of a classic.  And an epic.  Need to get it right.  It’s all about that bit Beatles-esque ending!  🙂  Yep… puts a smile on my face when I get it right.  I’m on my third run through now.  It’s a delicate balancing act.  If I can get the overall feel of the album right then I may have just been the ‘producer’ on the best album of 2011.  😉  2024 – yep… I think that run through has got it!  This is one of the tricky ones in the set.  It has so many very quiet parts.  This is the one that might throw the feel of the album.  When I am wearing my “mastering” hat I have to make sure that the level of this particular song sits right in the context of the album.  This is the song that I may well have to fine tune in the cold light of day upon repeat listens to the album as a whole.

2040 – Working on Life Will Be the Death of Me at the moment.  This is such a great song.  Perhaps my favourite on the album.  It’s got everything I like in a song.  Just got to make sure it sits in the ‘frame’ of the album as beautifully as it does in my head.  I know I’m talking a mixture of poetic bollocks and technical jargon… but, hey… this is a site about music for people who are interested in music!  2043 – Just running through the song for the third time.  Tweaks here and there. I’m only really messing with the overall volume levels here.  The majority of the work was in the mix. And I’ve lived with the mixes long enough to know that they’re right.  This has been the advantage of building the album up song by song over a year.  It has enabled me and Bill to really get to know the album.  In detail.  Now I’m just rounding it off.

2209 – Having a (careful) Jack Daniels and listening to the 5 songs so far.  Sounding good.  I shall call it a day for the moment!

2241 – Typed a message to Bill.  Hey… I haven’t had anything to eat since this morning!  Hmmm… cheese on toast beckons!  Night people.

1600 hours 18th June 2011 – Here I go again.  Just having a listen with fresh ears to the work I did last night.  I can immediately hear that I need to tweak a couple of things in Pitfall.  I also need to bring the volume of Escape Plan down slightly.  Although ‘theoretically’ it’s right (at about -11.6 RMS)… my ears tell me it’s slightly off.  At the end of the day I have to trust my (partially deaf) ears. They got me to where I am today!

Although I noted last night that I thought I’d have to increase the punch of Calm a little… today it sounds just fine.  So I think I’ll leave it be.  Hmmmm.  I seem to have a fair bit of work to do before I can even begin on the next section of the album.  😦  I do a downturned face… but really, this is quite exciting.  The last part of a process which has taken a year already!  So I’ve got to get it right!  Yes… the Calm and the Storm sounds fantastic.  It gives a smack in the mouth while quietly caressing you at the same time!  Ha ha!

1643 Noted that Life will be the Death of Me has a few noises in the chorus which I need to check out.  Were they intentional sounds? Just gotta check that out.  My notebook is full of workings, notes and figures!  Ha ha!  Like a scientist or something!

1707 – so  I’ve made a couple of adjustments to Pitfall.  They may not be enough… but I’ll allow them to settle and see how they sit within the context of the album later.

1720 – a little tweak needed to Escape Plan and it’s STILL crashing my whole studio.  I don’t know what it is about this song?!?  I know it’s a classic, but does it have to be so temperamental??? 🙂

1736 – Hmmm. The ‘noise’ in Life will be the Death was a little glitchy beat.  There on purpose to screw with your ears.  Therefore I have left it alone.  I should have had more faith in myself!  Ha ha! 1737 – Now I can move on to the next set of songs!

1753 – Ready Set… Explode! sounds superb.  Great little song.  Explosive ending!  Haha!

1757 – Here we go with Mean Machines.  I anticipate this being one of the trickiest songs to get right.  It is such a heavy, loud dance orientated song.  It is naturally loud.  It has natural power.  I have to tame it gently!!!

1927 – I’ve reached Chasing Chaos now.  Another explosive song. I think I’m nailing everything so far.  I will still have to have another listen to everything I’ve done later and make sure I’m on track.  Any changes I make during this session will be part of the album FOR EVER!  See… it’s important stuff.  I’m on my 7th coffee!  I feel quite alone here.  Trapped in the studio.  Am I a scientist or a prisoner?  1937 – Never have I been so precise.  I suppose the eyes (or rather ears) of the world will be on this album more than anything I’ve done previously.  Therefore it probably warrants the time and effort!  In fact I feel this album is the culmination of 20 years work. The pinnacle of my musical effort. The music on this album is, if I say so myself, pretty superb.  Listening to it through in this much detail really highlights the intelligence and the catchiness of these songs.  They are more than a collection – this is an album in the true sense of the word.

2120 – PULLING MY HAIR OUT!!!  See, now I remember something which I had forgotten!  Where We Go Next crashed my studio.  I remember I managed to get one version off the computer before it died.  That was last year.  And that is the version that has been streamable ever since.  But now I want to produce a new version for the Download/CD whatever.  … (for the album would be more accurate).  This new version needs to fit in with the feel of the other songs.  But I can’t access the song because it is corrupted!  Arrrrgggghhh!!!  So.. I’ve spent the last couple of hours rebuilding the song.  I’ve even re-recorded the drums.  Hmmm.  I’m pretty pissed off right now.  I can only hope that I manage to produce a better version than before.  That is usually what happens when these things are sent to test me! 2131 – I’m trying my best.  If I get this right I think I’ve managed to not only salvage the situation… but I may just have produced a better version than the original!  Woohooo!

2138 – I think I’ve done it.  I will need to listen to it again in the morning….  But I think I’ve nailed the song.  If anything the song now breathes more and yet still packs a gutteral punch towards the end.  Cool.

2152 – I think I’ll call it a day for now.  I’ve had a skim listen and I can still hear a few things that ain’t right.  But on the whole I think I’m nearing a perfect album.

0958 hours 19th June 2011 – Okay… I sit here with a coffee.  Ready to run through what I have so far and take MORE notes! Haha!

1017 – As first run throughs go it wasn’t bad.  But I have to change the levels of most of the songs.  It’s just that new day, morning, fresh ear thing.  Anyone who produces music to any extent will know what I mean!

1130 – Another listen through the album-so-far commencing.  Hmmm… A flick through the songs suggests that I need to put the levels of Pitfall and Mean Machines up even more.  But other than that I think I’m nearing the finishing line!  (Thank God!).

1440 – Yep… Still tweaking this set of songs.  (I’ve painted a wall too – just to give myself a break! Ha ha!).  Can’t wait to move onto the final batch.  Until then though – I’m still trying to get a trio of songs correct.  Pitfall, Mean Machines and Thousand Steps.  If I can get these right then I’ve cracked it!

1515 – Just completed those tweaks.  Just checking some other albums to see what they have by way of dynamic range.  I’ll add them to the list at the start rather than here.  Them Crooked Vultures packs a punch at -6.4 RMS!  Just running Tallest Man on Earth through now.  A very “home recording” sounding album… I expect a lot from it!  Hmmm… -11.6 RMS.  As I expected really.  A Dynamic Range of 8.  I can understand how most rock bands want to have a crushing, in your face sound… and Them Crooked Vultures certainly achieve that. The thing with the Eleventh Hour Initiative album is that there is a lot of darkness and light.  It needs to be treated a little more gently. It’s not about numbers… it’s about ears.  But still… it will be interesting to see if I can pull off a Dynamic Range figure of around 8.  This is pretty much the magic number.  The balance between sounding bouncy and interesting, but still having enough sheer volume to attract the crunch crowd!  Ha ha!

1627 – Just running off a version of Twelve. The twelfth track on the album.  And it’s called Twelve. (see what we did there!). 😉 I need to listen to the last couple of songs in the context of the album.  But I now have a complete set of songs to evaluate.

2045 – HUUUGEEE Chinese for Father’s Day!  Completely bloated. Now back here I sit.  In my cell.  Three more ‘tweaks’ to do before I can have a “headphone listen-through”.

2319 – It has been a LONG few days.  I’m still in my cell.  But I’m listening through the entire album on my high quality headphones and it sounds amazing.  I think I’ve finished.  I SAID I THINK I’VE FINISHED!!!!  Bloody hell.  That was an ordeal.  I’m not saying that the final outcome isn’t fantastic… but that was a long slog. And it’s probably not over yet.  But at least I now have a set of songs to burn to a CD and subject to a week or so in the car.  That is the final test!  Ha ha!

So, how does Escapism compare to those albums I measured myself against along the way.  Well… it weighs in with a Dynamic Range of 9 and an RMS of -11.4 which is not bad at all.  In fact, I was aiming to hit a DR of roughly 8… so I am well chuffed.

Chinese Democracy – DR 10, RMS -12.7

Escapism – DR 9, RMS -11.4

The Wild Hunt – DR 8, RMS -11.6

It slots in between Chinese Democracy and The Wild Hunt in the scheme of things.  And this is bloody marvellous.  An album that cost $10,000,000 and an album that I rate as the best of recent years.  The DR number is the magical number.  I seem to have managed to get more Dynamic Range than the Tallest Man on Earth whilst at the same time being (marginally) louder.  That is not bad at all.  In fact I’d go so far as to say I have done well.  You done good pig.  🙂

This is of course all a load of bollocks if you have no interest in studio related music production.  But for those of you have stuck with me through the 25 cups of coffee you’ll understand that music is a game.  A game where the loudest music wins.  It has been this way for the last 20 years. You see, when the CD was first invented it opened people’s eyes/ears to the possibilities of increased dynamics in recorded music.  Dynamics meaning the extent of the difference between a quiet sound and a loud sound.  Now… to cut to the chase (a book could be written about this!) over the years it was realised that the general public seem to flock towards loud music. Therefore artists would make sure their music was the loudest – so it would win the loudness war on the radio.  Bear in mind that this battle has been raging since the beginning of musical time with similar wars being played out over vinyl jukeboxes.  But the CD changed the terms of engagement.  And producers realised that you could make a CD VERY loud!  So over the course of the 1990s CDs became louder and louder.  The upside to the loudness is obvious.  Volume pricks the consumer’s ears and therefore leads to increased record sales.  The downside is that the dynamic range which I have been bleating on about is squeezed.  It is reduced.  The difference between the lows and the highs becomes non-existent.  Everything is just LOUD!!!

With music the excitement is often from the quiet LOUD quiet LOUD aspect.  Think Nirvana, Pixies, Jeff Buckley you name it.  When you squeeze every drop of ‘loudness’ from a CD you lose this thrill.  It can become a chore to listen to.  And yet everyone does of course want their music to be loud.  In a way you can’t win.  It’s about compromise.

The mp3 digital download hasn’t changed anything.  I chose to put streamable versions of the Eleventh Hour songs on the internet over the course of the year.  This was primarily to enable Bill and I to get a feel for what songs worked, and ideas for a track listing.  I chose to join the loudness war to a certain extent.  There are far better purveyors of the battle out there though.  You only have to listen to Soundcloud to hear songs that are amazingly LOUD.  To the point where I don’t quite know how they did it. (well, that’s not entirely true.  It is far easier to make electronic music frighteningly loud and most of Soundcloud is electronic).  But I didn’t want our songs to be unfairly dismissed so I made sure they were able to at least stick their heads above the parapet.

I like the story about the mastering of Chinese Democracy.  Now, bear with me, you don’t have to like Chinese Democracy to read this story.  Axl Rose worked on his Guns N’ Roses album, “Chinese Democracy”, for a decade.  He spent a ton of money on it.  Went through musicians and producers like a knife through chocolate mousse. So when it came time to mastering the album you can imagine that he was probably pretty intense about it!  Ha ha! Mastering an album means getting the levels right and giving the songs the syrup that glues them together into an ‘album’ rather than a ‘collection of songs’.  So Axl must have been excited but scared too.

The producer gave Axl three versions of the final album to choose from.  A squashed, loud, commercial version, a middle ground version, and an album with the dynamics intact.  Now… bearing in mind the pressure Axl would have been under to recoup the money invested in the album you could be forgiven for thinking he went for the obvious choice.  The producer certainly thought he would.  He gave the three albums to Axl and told him that the dynamic album was his own personal choice.  Ha was surprised when Axl picked the dynamic version over the LOUD version.  This decision went against all “common sense” of the time.  It was brave.  And I think that even if you don’t like him or his music it does at least paint one aspect of his character in a positive light!

Okay… I have rambled here.  And this will probably be the longest post I ever write.  But I am describing choices.  Choices musicians have to make.  I am part of the loudness war as is every musician on the planet and I have learned from it.  I have picked up on certain production techniques.  Certain processes which are often used to make a track louder can also be used in an artistic manner.  These flourishes can be heard all over Escapism.  But Escapism is no longer a LOUD album. It is still a loud album.  But it is not a LOUD album. Do you get my drift?  I want this album to kick like Pump by Aerosmith, or Back in Black by AC/DC.  It is my choice.  I want the music to bounce.  And as I sit here listening to it, it certainly does bounce.  It all sounds bloody brilliant.  But it is still a loud album.  This is alternative rock not jazz.  An RMS of -14 (which is considered by audiophiles to be a good ball park figure) would not be right for this album at this time.  You have seen the numbers which I set out at the beginning.  Those albums were picked pretty much at random (they happened to be next to the computer… well… okay … I may have run downstairs to fetch Death Magnetic!) and yet they are the kind of albums that Escapism will have to stand along side.  And as I listen I can hear that this album will stand proud.

I think I shall stop typing now.  It is late and I have rambled.  But I’ve been able to set my thoughts out along the way.  I’ve documented the journey.  That was what I created this site for in the first place.  I thank you.  Good night!

Album Review: Iron Maiden – ‘Powerslave’

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Here’s a new thing I’m gonna do.  I’ve always been a fan of album reviews.  As a student I lapped up NME and Melody Maker.  My problem with most reviews is that they’re written so close to the event.  So soon after an album release.  Therefore likely with very few listens.  You only have to read the reviews of Be Here Now by Oasis to realise how badly wrong things can go!!! This has always foxed me.  You see, I am one of those people who sticks a CD in the car (yes… still a CD!), and then listens to that CD until destruction.  Often months at a time.  And after the monumental number of ‘listens’ I rack up I truly know the album inside out.  I know the good and the bad.   In my head I then imagine I’m reviewing the album.  And the review is always easy because I know every single note of the album inside out.  If reviewers had to live with an album for 6 months you would get a whole different appraisal!  Probably a very honest one!  But of course… that’s impossible.  You need the review before or on the day of release!  So… anyway… I’ve decided to stick up the occasional review on this site.  The reviews will give a window into my world.  The albums I choose to review will not necessarily be representative of anything in particular… but they will be a snapshot of my life!

So… recently I’ve decided to listen to a cassette in the tape player of my van.  I’ve got a CD player in the car and a tape player in the van.  Now.. having moved house a couple of times I found it extremely difficult to actually find a cassette to put in the van!  I’ve only got CDs, and even then most of them have now been stuck onto the computer as MP3s.  You definitely get a sense that “physical media” is dead and buried!  Anyway… I managed to find one, solitary tape.  Powerslave by Iron Maiden.  An album I never owned on anything other than cassette.  So… a couple of months ago into the van it went.  And 100 listens later:

Okay.  Powerslave.  Hmmm.  First of all, you have to bear something in mind when you listen to my thoughts on this album.  Iron Maiden were pretty much my first love.  The most accessible of ‘metal’ bands, and for me, one of the most important.  At the time I bought this cassette, probably the late ’80s, I was much more into CDs and therefore this particular album was one of my least played of Maiden‘s career.  However, that is not to say I didn’t know the songs.  Many of these songs were played on the associated tour and were captured on the concert CD “Live After Death”.  In any case, when I say this album was one of the lesser played of my Maiden albums, I’m probably still talking 10,000 listens!  Ha ha!

Anyway, having listened to it in the van over the last couple of months I can say that the first thing that strikes you is the production.  The whole album has a warm, punchy, analogue sound.  In fact I’d go so far as to say that this is the archetypal “Iron Maiden sound”.  A lot of this probably has to do with the fact that I have only ever listened to this album on tape.  Tape has that effect on a sound. Any sound.  But it seriously suited Iron Maiden.  And so I listened to my old, worn, warped tape.

The era of Powerslave was arguably Maiden at their peak.  It was released in 1984 and features the “classic” line-up of Bruce Dickinson, Adrian Smith, Dave Murray, Nick McBrain and Steve Harris.  This is THE Maiden line-up.  And funnily enough, through thick and thin this line-up is still in existence today.  There have been a lot of ups and downs along the way – and in fact Maiden lost me as a fan for a good few years – but the nostalgic line-up is back together (with an added Geordie for extra measure).

So, Powerslave.  This album has the weight of a thousand sweaty teenage boys’ dreams on its shoulders.

Marty:  Let's talk about your music today...uh...one thing that puzzles me
        ...um...is the make up of your audience seems to be ...uh...
        predominately young boys.
David:  Well it's a sexual thing, really isn't it.  Aside from the
        identifying the boys do with us there's also a re-reaction to the
        female.....of the female to our music.  How did you put it?
Nigel:  Really they're quite fearful - that's my theory.  They see us on
        stage with tight trousers we've got, you know, armadillos in our
        trousers, I mean it's really quite frightening...
David:  Yeah.
Nigel:  ...the size...and and they, they run screaming.

Powerslave opens with Aces High.  A great opening song.  One of the greatest opening songs!  An interesting fact about Maiden (and perhaps a lot of heavier music generally) is that very few of the songs are about ‘love’.  There are no standard ‘love songs’.  Maiden take this a little further in that most of their songs are completely impersonal.  They tend to be songs about war, songs based on books, TV or poetry.  Aces High is a war song.  It’s the song they opened their gigs with at the time.  They spliced a Churchill quote onto the front of the song and it went down a storm.  A real kick of a song.  A song that Dickinson tended to struggle with live at the time.  As a singer he earned the nickname “the air-raid siren”.  And this album features much of his absurdly high pitched singing.  And he expanded on his “rasp”.  A voice used to greater effect in the ’90s, you can hear it evidenced on this album.

Two Minutes to Midnight then slices in with its great opening guitar riff.  This was Adrian Smith’s song and you can tell.  It has a different fire to the other songs.  Steve Harris tends to be the main songwriter for Iron Maiden.  In fact… to be honest that is a huge understatement.  Steve pretty much IS Iron Maiden.  But Two Minutes to Midnight certainly showcased what the other members could achieve if they were allowed to!  Dickinson is at his vicious best.  I used to have the poster for this song on my wall as a kid.  Eddie (the band mascot) sitting in the foreground with a nuclear explosion mushroom cloud serving as the backdrop.  Awesome artwork. Awesome song.

In fact… now that I’ve mentioned artwork I think I might just mention Derek Riggs.  Derek was the artist for all of Maiden‘s ‘golden-era’ work.  He came across as a strange little man on the only footage I’ve seen of him.  But at his best (during the ’80s) he came up with some inspirational album cover art.  Perhaps some of the best.  Although I personally favour some of the other album covers, I have to admit that Powerslave is a classic.  Yes… a classic ‘metal’ album cover.  A classic album needs a classic cover.  Hmmm… do you think I’m gonna end up concluding that this is a classic album by any chance?!?  😉

The next track on the album is a strange one.  Losfer Words (Big ‘Orra).  Now, I was never a fan of the name of this instrumental.  Not then and certainly not now.  Poor.  Very poor.  But I have to look beyond the title and into the meat and two veg of the song.  And actually… it’s a pretty damn fine instrumental.  Certainly not up to the standard of something like “The Crusade” by Trivium (that IS an instrumental to end all instrumentals!), but it is a real tour de force for Steve Harris and Nicko McBrain.  Steve is the bass player and Nicko is the drummer.  And this song, and in fact this whole album is about the bass and the drums.  I think Steve and Nicko as a team were at the top of their game on this album.  Losfer Words is a mental showdown for the pair.  Nicko is one of the most distinctive drummers of all time.  He tends to have a motto: “Why hit one drum when you could hit a hundred?”.  He owns Losfer Words.  He owns the album.  His drumming is killer throughout.  I bet a lot of boys took up drumming after listening to Nicko.  (because you can’t ‘watch’ him – he’s always hidden behind a wall of drums!).  In fact Dickinson probably rebelled against this when he went solo in the ’90s.  He went into a shop and asked for the “biggest drum kit they had”.  The guy behind the counter said “Well… we could probably make a kit up of as many drums as you want.”  Dickinson replied “No… I only want three drums… I just want those three drums to be the biggest you can get!”.

For all its technical difficulty and complex drum and bass work, the honest truth is that a song like Losfer Words could only have been helped by having Bruce sing something on it.  What’s the point of having the greatest metal singer of all time and leaving him to sip Soda Stream in the studio storeroom?  Come on guys… what the hell was this all about?!? And change the name of the song!!!

The next song, Flash of the Blade, is credited to Dickinson.  It has aspects to it which are quite pleasing.  The chorus for example has a nice enough melody and it is perfectly well sung.  The playing all round on the album by everyone is spectacular.  But.. you can’t help but feel that Flash of the Blade is album filler.  Quite good album filler… but album filler nonetheless.

As the Duellists emanates from the van’s speakers I can’t help but notice that my cassette is incredibly warped on this song.  Dickinson is singing like an X-Factor hopeful.  Anyway… terrible song.  Needs no more said about it.

A turn of the tape (remember having to do that?!?) reveals the next song.  Back in the Village is likely a song referencing one of my favourite TV shows of all time – the Prisoner.  And Back in the Village kicks ass!  Serious ass!  I see now that this song is also credited to Adrian Smith. That makes sense.  This song hits you in the face similarly to Two Minutes to Midnight.  Back in the Village has always been an underrated song.  I have never heard Maiden play it live.  I have never heard them mention it.  It’s like it doesn’t actually exist.  Fits with the theme of the Prisoner actually!  Ha ha!  When I was a kid I never gave Back in the Village the time of day.  Pure album filler.  However, re-evaluating it after 100 more listens I can confirm that this song is the dark horse of the album.  A killer guitar riff (perhaps one of the reasons they never played it live – it’s killer to the point of being impossible! ha ha!), a great snarling vocal by Dickinson and pure powerhouse playing all round.  A friend of mine (actually a top music reviewer) recently said that this was the second best song on the album.  I have to admit that I look forward to turning the tape to hear this song.  Perhaps the most underrated, undervalued Maiden song ever?

The title track is the pop song of the album.  It starts with an intro that reminds you of Michael Jackson‘s Thriller.  Then the Maiden stomp enters like a full force lovin’ machine.   Bass and Drums.  Killer.  And I’m pretty sure I hear guitar synthesisers on this song too.  A little two-faced after boasting on earlier albums how there were “no synthesisers used in the making of this album”. Ha ha!  Oh well. I’ve backtracked on my own decisions enough times in my life to know that a statement is only ever as good as the second it’s made.  Ten seconds later… u-turn!  Ha ha!  Anyway, Powerslave is another kick-ass song.  Dickinson’s vocals are excellent and there are a few different tones on display with the instrumentation.  The song mellows the feel of the rest of the album.  You could probably say it was the most rounded song on the album, the perfect showcase for the band… if it wasn’t for the closing track!

Yes… the final track of the album. A song that for me is far and away the greatest of the ‘long songs’ Iron Maiden have written.  It is another song based on literature, and for me it is also the best example.  Rime of the Ancient Mariner is everything an epic song should be.  It clocks in at over 13 minutes and never gets dull.  It features amazing instrumentation and cinematic atmosphere.  Just listen to that middle section.  Just the bass and guitars, with the sounds of the ship creaking!  Magnificent!  The weaving of the classic poem into a rock song is done with perfection.  Steve Harris has dropped the ball with these ‘epic’ songs on so many occasions, yet here he gets it all absolutely right!  The way the song comes out of the soft middle section with a monumental gallop always brings a smile to my face.  Bruce is again on top form.  This song is what music is all about.  It must have seemed such a risk at the time.  But now it still holds its own.  A truly epic work of art. The perfect end to a classic album.

So… I think I’ll give my album reviews a mark out of 10.  One thing you must always bear in mind with me is that I use the full scale!!!  1 is dire.  5 is average.  10 is perfect.  Weighing up the pros and cons of Powerslave I have to give it the only fitting mark.  It is not a bad mark.  It is a good mark!  Thank you for reading.  I shall be back with the next review soon…  for the album I currently have in my car!

Iron Maiden – Powerslave: 6/10